Friday, September 06, 2013

No Country for Old Women (or young ones)

Today I got a thing in the mail from Hadassah.  My mom made me a lifetime member.  I didn’t really know what Hadassah was, I only knew that Hadassah arms were those flabby upper arms that were like bat wings on old ladies.  But it said in the papers that it was an organization for women Zionists.  And I realized that I’m a woman Zionist.  But not like they mean.   Zionism is Jewish nationalism.  The desire for a jewish state.  But I want a state for WOMEN. They  can be Jewish women, and all other women too.  Women don’t have a state.  We don’t have a country.  An actual place where we can go and be welcomed and be safe from our enemies.  (Imagine if instead of Israel there were just a bunch of battered Jew shelters scattered throughout enemy territory?)   Then people could yell at us “go back to your “cuntry,” and we could say, “happy to, fucker.”  Our country would have to be very big, because there are a lot of us.  And a lot of us who need that space.  All the women from Syria and Afghanistan and Iraq, and Bosnia, and Egypt and India, and Juarez, and Steubenville could come to our nation.  If this sounds absurd, then maybe the idea of countries or nations is too.  

Tuesday, July 23, 2013

Pimping the tooth fairy.

Grossness.  Apparently there wasn't enough exploitation in the world, so some Disney man and his friends came up with a way to own the tooth fairy.  They made them as fake and Disnified as possible (in vomitous purple and pink mostly) and called them the "real" tooth fairies.  Everyone knows the tooth fairy is our parents.  Maybe a few kids believe it's really a fairy, but if they get all involved in the world then they're either going to be really upset when they find out that their parents conspired with the tooth fairy pimps OR they're going to go insane.  Either way,  I hope those girls do some damage when they find out.   Yeah, it's disappointing when you find out that the Easter Bunny and Santa aren't real, but those two aren't trying to get you to create an online relationship with them, that could end up with you meeting some creepy man at his hotel.  Who are these "Real" tooth fairies?   Strange adults who are having children write to them and who are writing back!!!??  EEewwww.   Where's Chris Hansen and to Catch a Predator?

Okay, so here's a link [that doesn't work because I just had to take the link down because they do not want you to see it -- I will work on finding another way.  it's awesome in it's awfulness] to the video where you can see the investor's pitch.  See if you can get through it without horking.    They could've at least gotten union actors.  I almost didn't believe it was real, but they already have a working website.

And here's a picture from the website.  Look on the left side under the "For Parent's section.  The second option is UPGRADE Your Girl.   WHAT????????  Upgrade me?   That is not an option.  When you have a kid, that's it.  You don't get to upgrade like a new iphone.  If we're not good enough, it's probably your fault anyway.  And you wouldn't need an upgrade if you weren't trying to sell us bullshit like this.     Just put the money under the pillow and we're all happy.    And since I'm not supposed to know it was you, don't expect a thank you note.

And girls, just say no.  If it feels creepy, it probably is.

Thursday, April 11, 2013

children and guns

First a lot of children (mostly first grade girls) were shot at Sandy Hook school by a man, and a lot of people said there should be gun control, but some people, like the NRA said that if everyone in the school had had guns, then he wouldn't have been able to do what he did (even though he killed 26 people in 5 minutes).   At the time I was thinking, "if you're talking about arming 6-year old girls, I'm all ears."

But in the last two weeks, there have been two shooting by young children.  First a 4 year old (boy) shot a 6 year old, and then a different 4 year old (boy) shot the 38 year old wife of the gun owner (they didn't even say "allegedly" shot in either story- kids have no rights).   I'm sure the NRA thinks that if that 6 year old was armed too and if the wife of the gun owner had her own pretty pink gun, then these tragedies could've been avoided.  

It's clear to me that we should NOT be arming 4 year old (boy)s.  They're too immature, unlike the adults who left their guns in handy reach of the four year olds.    I think you should have to be at least 10.  Which I am.

What's Next? Burkahs?

A middle school in Petaluma California decided that girls could only wear leggings if they wore shorts or skirts or dresses over them.   They said it was because it was too distracting for the boys.  Next thing you'll see people stoning girls in the playground because their ankles are showing.  WTF?  Why don't they just make the boys wear leggings over their eyes and then there won't be a problem.   Girls should be allowed to wearing anything they want to school including nothing, and be perfectly safe from other people.    If you get too excited looking at some stupid leggings, then fuck yourself! literally!

Of course I would totally support the no leggings/tights policy if it had been done for the right reason, which is YOU'RE NOT WEARING ANY PANTS!!!!!  It looks like you didn't finished getting dressed.  tights are NOT PANTS!!!    Even if they're solid and you didn't buy the see-thru kind for $100 from lulu lemon and then "surprise - i can see everything!!"  it's still not a good look.  i can either see your underwear or your camel toe, or both.   And I'm not discriminating against girls.  Boys should not be allowed to wear bike shorts or wrestling outfits or speedos, EVER.

Sunday, February 19, 2012

Why didn't the kids tell?

They did, you idiots.  They were telling people for more than 20 years that the teacher at Miramonte was doing creepy things to kids at school, like blindfolding them and feeding them cookies with homemade semen frosting.  And what happened?  The guidance counselor told them to stop making up stories, and the police said there was not enough evidence, so the teacher just carried on for 20 more years racking up victims and now everyone's like, "how could this have gone on for so long?"  I'll tell you how, because the adult male teacher has rights and credibility, and children have none of that.  Even the stories of many children don't add up to counting more than one white man having to defend himself.  "You don't understand the harm that accusations can do?"  YES I DO, and I don't care.  it's more important to protect the children, and since they don't get any help anywhere, I think that children or other people who have been molested or assaulted or whatever should wear buttons like the one below and then even though there's no "record" that would allow other people to be warned, at least other people could find out who they might want to avoid eating cookies with!

f'd by fb

I got "disabled" on facebook because they've become birthers and want to see my real birth certificate.  Of course I lied about my age because a ten year old isn't allowed to have a fb page open to the public.
Right, like all the creeps trolling for bodies on there aren't lying about their age and gender too?   Fb should at least give me a disabled parking thing so I (okay, my mom) can pull up in front of actual places to go shout my updates at live people.

Something Fishy at the Farmer's Market

And it's not the fish.  It's the eggs.  There's one place we get eggs that's supposed to come from happy chickens running around with their beaks on, and the eggs cost $5 for a dozen.  One day they weren't there and we went to a different egg man, and this one had brown eggs for almost $6 a dozen, mixed for  $5, and white ones for only $3.  I asked why the white ones were so cheap, and he said they were on sale because there were so many more of them.  I asked what's the difference and he said, the only difference is the white ones come from white chickens and the brown ones come from brown chickens.  I agree that brown chickens are cuter, but you don't eat the shell (except sometimes a little bit by mistake).  Also  I thought it was nice to see  the brown ones costing more than whitey for a change, but now it's like six months later and the white ones are still on sale for $3, and I'm starting to think they just get them in big flats at Costco.  It just doesn't add up.   cause if they always have to sell the white ones for half the price, then they would just sell them all as chicken meat and get more brown chickens, right?   I kind of don't want to get eggs anymore anyway, because as soon as the chickens don't lay enough eggs, then they kill them and make them into meat, and that makes all my eggs taste bad, no matter how cheep they are.

Friday, January 13, 2012

Dogs Against Romney

Obviously children and animals can't vote, or we wouldn't be in this mess.  I know some children are monsters (like we-have-to-talk-about Kevin), and that some animals eat other ones, or just kill them and drag them around the house in their mouths all day, but still, why shouldn't we have a say in the people who get to make all the rules that we have to follow (and if we don't, we have to take meds)?    If you can't find another reason to not like Romney (then there's something wrong with you or you're the 0.01%), then just ask yourself if you really want the commander in chief to be a man who drove to Canada to escape the draft with the "family" dog strapped to the roof, and his kids in the back horrified at the dog shit dripping down the windows.  I'd hate to think what he'd do to a dog who wasn't a member of the family (and don't even get me started about the Mormons and their "family" values).   And please don't call Mr. Rommell "Mittens" because I know a cat named Mittens, and he's a nice cat and his name shouldn't be dragged through the dog poop like that.

Saturday, December 31, 2011

How I got expelled from Sunday School

We were asked to talk to God.  Here's my "talk".  It was pretty one-sided:       

Alright God.  What the fuck?   First of all, I want you to know that I am here under duress.  I am forced to come here because my parents/owners are making me.   I don’t believe in you, and if you are real, then we should definitely not be worshipping you.  No, Mrs. Hoogen, I will not “pray” silently.  Why shouldn’t the other children hear what I have to say?   They’re being brain-washed, even if they’re supposed to silently do it to themselves.  God is a sham/scam/lie.   Really?  He’s going to send me to hell?  Is that the same as the principal’s office?  Why, because I asked a question? Pointed out the obvious?  You were the one who taught us about God telling Abraham to kill his son.  Then why don’t we worship the Son of Sam?  Now if you’ll excuse me, I was talking to “god.”  I normally would not talk to you, but since I’m in your “house,” whatever.  I’m not going to talk to you anymore after this, because you’re an egomaniac, or just a maniac.  Everyone praying to you and treating you like god, and you think you’re all that – and you periodically drown everyone and destroy cities, and you killed Mrs. Lot because she disobeyed and looked, but you let Mr. Lot offer his daughters to the rapist mob and then take them to the mountains and impregnate them himself.  You should be in prison, not owning all the biggest houses in every town and city.   You might have the rest of the people fooled, but not me.   You’re NAKED!  Like Noah was.  And it’s not a pretty sight.  You’re disgusting.   And I’m not an atheist except it depends on how you define believe in.  I’m not going to say you don’t exist, because I don’t know.  I don’t know a lot of things.  But if you do exist, I don’t believe in you – like people believe in love or magic.  I don’t believe you have my best interests at heart.  How come those 10 commandments involve respecting your parents, but not your children?  They don’t need to be respected, because they’re bigger and can kill us if they want to –and a lot more children are killed by their parents than parents are killed by their children.  That’s right.  They’re afraid of us.   How come children who kill their parents get harsher sentences than parents who kill their children?  Or at least fathers who kill their children.  Mothers get harsh sentences too, I guess because it’s considered unladylike – and of course mom is killing HIS children.  And maybe juries and judges are afraid that if their mothers could kill them they would.  Anyway, I’m getting off the track.  I don’t like these ten commandments, and I think they say an awful lot about you and what’s wrong with you.  Honor?   Honor me, motherfucker

Wednesday, August 31, 2011

I WISH it was the Planet of the Apes

Mother bear kills cub and then itself

I don't even know what to say about this, except to say that she should've killed the humans instead. ALL the humans.  What is wrong with people?  This momma grizzly is a hero (unlike Palin, who would probably approve of people keeping bears in cages and "milking" their gall bladders to make "medicine" for penis enlargement or whatever.)    Didn't people watch the Planet of the Apes?   I'm not saying all Chinese would do this.  I know there are animal rights people everywhere, but the Chinese government doesn't seem to have a problem with it, and when they take over the world next week then we shouldn't be surprised if us Americans end up in cages with metal vests on having our pancreases milked so the newly diabetic obese Chinese boys (cause that's what the children pretty much are) can have fresh insulin. 

I think it's time for a remake of Kung Fu Panda - but this one won't be a Disney movie.

Tuesday, July 05, 2011

Gender labeling of meat

It seems that there is a lot of violence in the animal world:  gang rapes by ducks, elephant seals attacking the females and "accidentally" killing baby seals, male otters beating up the females in order to "mate" (see my last post).   Meat should have gender labeling so that only the brutal animals will be eaten (if you still eat meat!).   And before you get all "women do the same thing to men, so everything is all fair and let's just leave it all alone" it's not ALWAYS the males abusing the females.   Female praying mantises eat the males - but still gender labeling will make that clear, so if you eat praying mantises or black widow spiders, then you'll know which ones to eat.   We should be eating the abusers, not their victims.

Eat your enemies, not your friends!

Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Our revolution must extend to the Otters (and beyond)

Below you will see a cute picture of an otter, one of my favorite animals.  But then, I read the caption, which I made bigger for you below that so you can read in horror what I read.   

I can no longer say that otters are my favorite animals.  Only the female otters.   It says "This otter, identified as female - her scarred face is an indicator of mating practices--"   What????   There's domestic violence among otters?   he has to scratch and chew her face as a part of 'mating practices'?  How exactly does that lead to more baby otters?  If she doesn't like you, then get off, you jerk otter.   people always excuse men for being violent and raping by saying they're just expressing their "animal nature."  Well if that's true, then we need to expand our feminist revolution to the animals, because at least half the animals are girls, and I don't think they're down with the "it's animal nature" argument.

So listen up Mr. Otter, next time you try to mate with a cute little female otter, you better check first and make sure she's not sporting a praying mantis tattoo!

Monday, June 27, 2011

What is wrong with this picture?

When a dying kid's wish is to kill

A nonprofit helps terminally ill children with the unusual -- and to some, alarming -- dream of hunting an animal

If you're dying wish is to murder an animal, then your death is not tragic; it's too late!! I'm sorry you have cancer, but leave the animals alone. What if I had cancer, and my dying wish was to shoot a kid who's dying wish is to shoot an animal? Where's my foundation? According to this article, the Make-A-Wish Foundation will no longer arrange for these hunting trips, because an animal rights activist got to them, which implies that they used to do it! WTF? I'm gonna start a foundation to help ill children with the unusual, and to some, alarming dreams that I personally approve of. My Manifesto will be coming out soon, and frankly, I can use a small army of kamikazi children to take out anyone (adults mostly) who get in my way.

Monday, June 20, 2011

My missing sisters (aka the war on girls)

There's a new book out called

Unnatural Selection: Choosing Boys Over Girls, and the Consequences of a World Full of Men

by Mara Hvistendah.
In nature, 105 boys are born for every 100 girls. This ratio is biologically ironclad. Between 104 and 106 is the normal range, and that's as far as the natural window goes. Any other number is the result of unnatural events.
Yet today in India there are 112 boys born for every 100 girls. In China, the number is 121—though plenty of Chinese towns are over the 150 mark. China's and India's populations are mammoth enough that their outlying sex ratios have skewed the global average to a biologically impossible 107. But the imbalance is not only in Asia. Azerbaijan stands at 115, Georgia at 118 and Armenia at 120. 
I think they are going to regret this later on.   LIke on prom night!

Tuesday, November 02, 2010

Friday, June 04, 2010

McDonalds is poisoning the children again

McDonald's Recalls 12 million Shrek Glasses Due to Cadmium Levels

And guess what?  These tainted goblets weren't made in China.  They were made in NEW JERSEY.

THis is murder.

A bird is mired in oil on the beach at East Grand Terre Island along the Louisiana coast on Thursday, June 3, 2010. Oil from the Deepwater Horizon has affected wildlife throughout the Gulf of Mexico. (AP Photo/Charlie Riedel)
 Or maybe this BPs way of making more oil, by killing the animals and turning them into fossil fuel.

Wednesday, May 05, 2010

lead toys, poison catfood, and now stabbing 4-year-olds

What the hell is happening in China?  I used to think it was terrible that they were giving away the girls to be adopted in America, but now I think maybe the girls are the lucky ones.   Or maybe this is what happens when you have too many men!

Chinese man stabs children in kindergarten, 31 hurt
Thursday, April 29, 2010; 5:08 AM 
BEIJING (Reuters) - A knife-wielding man injured 28 children, two teachers and a security guard in a kindergarten in eastern China, state media reported on Thursday, the fourth such stabbing case in recent weeks.
Xu Yuyuan, 47, an unemployed local man, broke into a classroom in Taixing city of eastern Jiangsu province on Thursday morning, attacking the children with a 20 cm long knife, the official Xinhua news agency said.
The injured children were all about four years old, and five are in critical condition, it added.

If there was any doubt about the need for a children's civil (or even just human) rights movement, it's gone.    Of course, children have been murdered - usually by their parents - since Abraham and Isaac and even before that, but it's usually one by one.  Now people (okay men mostly) are just going to where the children are corralled and killing as many as they can.

It happens in the United States too, but usually involves guns instead of knives, but I don't think we had 4 all in a row.  I just hope this doesn't become China's newest export.  I hope instead that they start making cheap Hello Kitty tazers for our little hands.

Saturday, May 01, 2010

Linky link link

my friend Angela complained that she couldn't link to individual posts, so I fixed it.  Now you can go through all my archives and share all your favorite Ethel posts (to a billion different places)!!!!!!

Okay everyone, spread out.

Thursday, April 29, 2010

Monkey Meatballs

Two arrested over monkey meatballs

Wed Apr 28, 2010 10:45am EDT

(Reuters) - Indonesian police have arrested a couple who made meatballs from the flesh of protected monkeys, an animal conservation group said on Wednesday.

The pair poached dozens of rare Javan langurs, also known as silver-leaf monkeys, from Baluran National Park in the east of Java island, according to a statement released by Indonesia-based animal protection group ProFauna.

"Police found 30 kilograms (65 pounds) meat estimated to come from 20 - 25 individuals, two rifles and a live langur," the statement said.

"The couple admitted that they had known what they did was against the law and they hunted the monkeys for their meat because beef and chicken were more expensive than the protected monkeys."

Meatball soup, known locally as bakso, is a popular dish in Indonesia.

The statement said police were now broadening their investigation to include checks on vendors suspected of selling the monkey meatballs, while ProFauna was in talks with the national park caretakers to prevent further poaching.

Indonesian law states that perpetrators of wildlife crimes face a maximum five year prison term and a fine of 5 million rupiah ($555), but the law is not always strictly enforced.

Of course the meat was cheaper than chicken and beef, because it's not for sale!!!!!!!!! Human meat is cheaper too. Why do you need meatballs in your soup? Monsters. Why can't people just eat matzoball soup instead of murderball soup.

Boycott Aryanzona

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Happy Earth Day - whatever

My grandmother said that my grandfather went to the first earth day back in 1970 - so he could meet other women to have sex with. That seems pretty much in line with the Supreme Court who are celebrating this earth day by declaring open season on the animals - fuck em, stomp em, make them fight each other to death, and then film it and call it speech. I really hope that movie "Furry Vengeance" is a documentary.
I don't think I ever want to develop any sexuality. It seems like people get off on all kinds of things that involve pain for someone or something else and they say they can't control themselves (or sometimes that they shouldn't have to). Yesterday I was at a grocery store and a woman at the dead fish counter ordered Chilean Seabass. I told her not to because there are only like 8 of them left, and she said, "but it tastes so good." It tastes good????? What is wrong with people? I bet her liver would taste good too, but that doesn't mean we should kill and eat her...necessarily. I guess as long as we think that our desire to eat, fuck and wear things is a reason to do it, we should just forget earth day and wait for more unpronouncable volcanos to make us sit the fuck down and chill. And that's another thing. People are actually mad at Iceland for that. Lucky for Iceland it went bankrupt.

Thursday, April 15, 2010

There's No Such Thing As Pedophilia

The idiot Vatican is saying that it's only the homosexual priests who are pedophiles and then not even as much as regular people. Once again I have to point out WHAT ABOUT ALL THE GIRLS WHO GET MOLESTED BY PRIESTS???? DON"T THEY COUNT???? Okay, but besides that, there's NO SUCH THING AS PEDOPHILIA. It's just a made up disease to excuse bad behavior. People who rape adults aren't called adultaphiles. People who steal other people's stuff aren't call theftophiles. People who murder aren't called murdophiles.

We ALL want to do things that we can't do because it's illegal or it would hurt someone else. So mostly we don't do those things. And when we do, we're the asshole and not the victim! Wanting to do it is not a crime. It's not even abnormal (given how many children are preyed on by adults - mostly their own relatives (according to the FBI and my fellow girl scouts), so we should stop talking about it like it's some shameful disease and just admit that children are attractive to a LOT of people (mostly men), or maybe we're just smaller and can't get away as easily, or no one will believe us, or we're already stuck in your house, or it's easier to threaten to kill us if we talk and have us believe you.

But we have a right NOT to be groped and raped by jerks who care more about themselves than about us. Children who get raped don't always turn out so good, so if you can't control yourself for the sake of the children, then you better watch your back if you ever end up in prison (remember Father Geoghan?)

Meanwhile, stop calling it a disease and pretending people just need therapy . They need to be put somewhere where they don't have access to their chosen sex objects (though we prefer to think of ourselves as PEOPLE), or better yet - send them to me and my gang. We'll take care of the "illness" with a raging case of "beat-the-crap-out-of-you-philia."

Monday, April 05, 2010

Who's Afraid of Ethel?

Apparently a lot of people. Idiots. In case you don't know what I'm talking about, there was some talk about me getting my own TV show. I even had some meetings, with bottled water. But apparently I am way too threatening to the establishment. Here's what a big agent said:
Most of the ‘edgier’ channels/buyers skew male, and won’t program a youthful female protagonist. And you're way too edgy for the female skewing buyers.
And this was an agent who LIKES me. Okay, so there can't be an Ethel show on channels that have shows like South Park or Family Guy or Simpsons because if there's a GIRL who's not just a side character then it's not "universal" and boys and men can't relate cause it must be just for girls. And the channels who make shows that are especially for girls don't want me because they're trying to sell thong underpants and makeup and easy bake ovens and they think that I would be encouraging girls NOT to buy those things -- which they're right about, even though I can think of some alternate uses for some of those things, like thong slingshots and easy bake chemistry experiments (product placement, right?). Anyway, what's a girl supposed to do? It's 2010 We're just gonna have to start our own networks - yeah right. It's hard not to be hating, but we must continue to battle on toward justice no matter how stupid and assholish the people in charge are. Plus if we weren't trying to change things we'd already be on the air.

FIght on my sisters (and good brothers).

Sunday, April 04, 2010

The Pope is going to hell!

The Vatican says that all the people whining about being raped by priests are just badmouthing the church. Oh, and happy Easter!!!!!!!!!
“Holy Father, the people of God are with you, and do not let themselves be impressed by the gossip of the moment, by the challenges that sometimes strike at the community of believers,” Cardinal Sodano said. Jesus spoke of courage in the face of tribulations, the cardinal continued, and referred to the apostle Peter’s account of Jesus during the passion: “When he was reviled, reviled not again; when he suffered, threatened not, but committed himself to him that judgeth righteously.” (from the NY TImes on Easter Sunday)
What would Jesus do? I think he would break his own rule about turning the other cheek and kill the Pope. I'm kind of glad the Pope is still acting like an asshole, because then maybe people will finally realize that he's just the head of a big child-abuse ring. (Most people think it's just boys who are being molested, but it's girls too - it's just that that's considered normal, so no one even notices). The Pope was a Nazi, and his brother is some bigwhig in Germany and part of the scandal there, though he says he never molested anyone, just beat them sadistically -- oh, so much better.

Anyway, the pope is big fat turd and people should start admitting it and saying shame on you to the pope instead of to the people (like me) who don't show him the respect which he does NOT deserve to have, because when the archbishop of BELGIUM says you're wrong, you know you are REALLY a pervert.

Wednesday, November 04, 2009

Abraham and Isaac

"Daddy loves you." video
videoThese are my favorite versions of the bible stories. Finally a version that actually makes sense (and it's funny).

Saturday, October 24, 2009

My First Hooker Halloween

Halloween is for children. And I guess for dogs too, but I don't think they enjoy their costumes as much as we do. I used to love Halloween, it's the only day of the year our neighbors let us kids into their houses and then give us candy (and we don't even have to go in the back room with Mr. Dixon). And what isn't great about a holiday where we can wear/be whatever we want and eat as much free candy as we want? But now that I've reached puberty (well, I haven't but, but most of my classmates have), it's hooker everything: hooker nurse, hooker pirate, hooker vampire, hooker veterinarian, hooker supreme court judge. Only for the girls, though. The boys still have normal costumes, but everything for girls has high heels, mini skirt, boobs, underwear, like all we girls want to be is hookers.

This year I'm going to be a hooker, too. But a real one. I'll have a black eye and torn clothes, and an angry expression on my face, and I'll have a gun too, to kill any pimp or john who messes with me. In fact, I'm going to be Aileen Wournos, who was supposedly a serial killer, but really it was a spree killing. She was a prostitute who killed rapist/johns - seven of them. She got punched or raped one too many times. Then they executed her. A horrible tragedy. Cause she was not finished with her work.

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

France has children too

Shock of shocks.  Woody Allen came out in support of Roman Polanski.  He thinks the only mistake Polanski made was not marrying the girl.

What is wrong with these people?  I'm actually glad that people signed the petition to "free Polanski" cause now we know who supports child rape.  Good to know.

here's a list of names: 
Woody Allen

Wes Anderson
Darren Aronofsky
Jonatham Demme
Stephen Frears
David Lynch
Martin Scorsese

Full list: (it might have been quicker to name who didn’t sign the petition)

Fatih Akin, Stephane Allagnon, Woody Allen, Pedro Almodovar, Wes Anderson, Jean-Jacques Annaud, Alexandre Arcady, Fanny Ardant, Asia Argento, Darren Aronofsky, Olivier Assayas, Alexander Astruc, Gabriel Auer, Luc Barnier , Christophe Barratier, Xavier Beauvois , Liria Begeja , Gilles Behat, Jean-Jacques Beineix, Marco Bellochio, Monica Bellucci, Djamel Bennecib, Giuseppe Bertolucci , Patrick Bouchitey, Paul Boujenah, Jacques Bral, Patrick Braoudé, André Buytaers, Christian Carion, Henning Carlsen, Jean-michel Carre, Mathieu Celary, Patrice Chéreau, Elie Chouraqui, Souleymane Cissé, Alain Corneau, Jérôme Cornuau, Miguel Courtois, Dominique Crevecoeur, Alfonso Cuaron, Luc et Jean-Pierre Dardenne, Jonathan Demme, Alexandre Desplat, Rosalinde et Michel Deville, Georges Dybman, Jacques Fansten, Joël Farges, Gianluca Farinelli (Cinémathèque de de Bologne), Etienne Faure, Michel Ferry, Scott Foundas, Stephen Frears, Thierry Frémaux, Sam Gabarski, René Gainville, Tony Gatlif, Costa Gavras, Jean-Marc Ghanassia, Terry Gilliam, Christian Gion, Marc Guidoni, Buck Henry, David Heyman, Laurent Heynemann, Robert Hossein, Jean-Loup Hubert, Alejandro Gonzalez Inarritu, Gilles Jacob, Just Jaeckin, Alain Jessua, Pierre Jolivet, Kent Jones (World Cinema Foundation), Roger Kahane, Nelly Kaplan, Wong Kar Waï, Ladislas Kijno, Harmony Korinne, Jan Kounen, Diane Kurys, Emir Kusturica, John Landis, Claude Lanzmann, André Larquié, Vinciane Lecocq, Patrice Leconte, Claude Lelouch, Gérard Lenne, David Lynch, Michael Mann, François Margolin, Jean-PierreMarois, Tonie Marshall, Mario Martone, Nicolas Mauvernay, Radu Mihaileanu, Claude Miller, Mario Monicelli, Jeanne Moreau, Sandra Nicolier, Michel Ocelot, Alexander Payne, Richard Pena (Directeur Festival de NY), Michele Placido, Philippe Radault, Jean-Paul Rappeneau, Raphael Rebibo, Yasmina Reza, Jacques Richard, Laurence Roulet, Walter Salles, Jean-Paul Salomé, Marc Sandberg, Jerry Schatzberg, Julian Schnabel, Barbet Schroeder, Ettore Scola, Martin Scorsese, Charlotte Silvera, Abderrahmane Sissako, Paolo Sorrentino, Guillaume Stirn, Tilda Swinton, Jean-Charles Tacchella, Radovan Tadic, Danis Tanovic, Bertrand Tavernier, Cécile Telerman, Alain Terzian, Pascal Thomas, Giuseppe Tornatore, Serge Toubiana, Nadine Trintignant, Tom Tykwer, Alexandre Tylski, Betrand Van Effenterre, Wim Wenders.

EDIT: new names

Isabelle Adjani
Antoine Aronin
Paul Auster
Morgane Beauverger
Candice Belaisch-Goldchmit
Yamina Benguigui
Pascal Bruckner
Jessika Cohen
Philippe Corbé
Jean-Paul Dayan
Katarina De Meulder
Arielle Dombasle
Nathalie Faucheux
Corinne Figuet
Pierre Forciniti
Louis Garrel
Albert Gauvin
Johanna Gozlan
Davide Homitsu Riboli
Taylor Hackford
Isabelle Huppert
Neil Jordan
Thierry Kamami
Milan Kundera
Gaelle Lancien
Claude Lanzmann
Bernard-Henri Lévy
Sam Mendes
Camille Meyer
Patrick Mimouni
Yann Moix
Mike Nichols
Sandra Nicolier
Marie Nieves Perez Neël
Salman Rushdie
Carine Sarna
Ysabelle Saura Del Pan
William Shawcross
Olivier Soares Barbosa
Steven Soderbergh
Nil Symchowicz
Danièle Thompson
Eugenia Varela Navarro
Diane von Furstenberg
Scott Foundas
Margaret Walker
Elsa Zylberstein

and yay for French director Luc Besson who disagreed.

and by the way.  Does everyone think that the one he got convicted of raping is the only girl he ever raped?

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Bride Expo Exposed!

NOTICE!!! Two upcoming bride expos demand massive protest and actions to save these women. I can't believe they are advertising for this. How dare they just sell women like that right out in the open like it's okay? Just because you call her a bride doesn't make it not selling women, and these poor women probably came here thinking they were going to work as waitresses or in a factory. Traffiking is trafficking and it's wrong - no matter how much cake and lace you put on it (and I DO love cake). DON'T let this offense to women and girls everywhere go unanswered. We will be gathering at the dates and places listed below. If you don't want to get arrested you can peacefully protest (in the doorways - as thickly as possible). If you are underage, like me, then you don't have to worry about your permanent record--meet us at 9am on the 23rd in front of the Jaws ride. The liberation of enslaved people is never wrong - that's Ethel's Law!

Next week there's one in Los Angeles, and in October in Orange County (details are below - so be sure to come if you're anywhere close). But they have these bride expos everywhere, so plan to go to the local one if you can't make the ones here.

Universal Hilton Bridal Show

555 Universal Hollywood Drive-Universal City 91608

Sunday August 23rd from 11am-4pm

Hyatt Regency Irvine Show
17900 Jamboree Road - Irvine, CA 92614
Sunday October 4th 11am-4pm

Tuesday, February 03, 2009

Current Events

If you're flying a plane, don't hit the birds.

Just because you lose your job and don't have money is not a reason to kill all of your children.

If Michael Phelps has to apologize for smoking pot, then the rest of us should have to apologize for NOT winning 8 gold medals.

When Ashleigh said she wanted to be a cosmetologist, Angela, who wants to be a lawyer, said "that should be your second choice."

If cows have to have babies to make all that milk, what happens to all those babies?

Does the kind of shoe you throw at a politician matter? Which makes a better statement, a child's shoe or a cowboy boot with spurs?

First Bush and his party had a giant party and trashed the country, and now they won't vote for the stimulation package so ALL children are going to be left behind. It's not all bad though, cause us children in Orange County finally know what it's like to have a snow day.

Wednesday, November 05, 2008

The Sadly Effect

For the first time in my life, I'm not totally horrifed to hear that country song "I’m proud to be an American." But I’m NOT proud to be a Californian. What kind of bullshit is that? Black is okay now, but fuck the gays? I guess they’re just afraid of the millions of Mexican lesbians who are going to come here for green cards.

I’m really happy that Obama won and that he crushed his nasty old opponent and his horrible mate. And I really hope that our democracy gets restored so I can vote when I'm old enough. I did get to vote in the mock election at our school (the Ronald Reagan Elementary School). Obama won, but there were a lot of idiots who voted for McCain cuase they said Sarah Palin was a hottie and they didn't want us all to have to be communists. I'm starting to think that maybe they are right to not believe in evolution because clearly they are not participating!

By the way, I don't know if I'm gay or not yet, but I'd like to have that option, thank you very much. And I know for sure that I oppose traditional marriage: that's where the husband's in charge and gets to make all the decisions and beat his wife and children and fart as loud as he wants to without saying excuse me.

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Monday, July 28, 2008

Batman is a dickflick

Ok, before I talk about the movie I just want to point out something I noticed in the paper. there were two big ads next to each other. One for Batman and one for Mamma Mia. They both listed their stars like all movie ads and posters do. Batman had 6 men and one woman, and the picture showed only men. Mama Mia listed 4 men and 4 women and had a picture with all of them. The one with half women and half men is considered a chick flick, and the one that has 6 times as many men as women is considered to be for everyone. Just a normal human movie. What the fuck?

Saturday, July 19, 2008

Beyond Abu Ghraib: Soldiers Playing Doctor with Actual PIGS!!

I'm not dead, i was just gone for a long time, for a few reasons, most of which I cannot go into now or I will lose the "privilege" to do my blog again.

The military wants to shoot pigs with automatic rifles and then practice treating the wounds. If they're being attacked by the pigs so that they need to shoot them, then why do they want to learn how to fix the pigs? Seems to me if they don't want to have to worry about treating soldiers with big gun holes, then they should bring them back home and leave the pigs alone.

By the way, when they're done with shooting and playing doctor with the pigs, do they eat them or just throw them away? People give me crap for not thinking that humans are superior to all the other animals, but humans are the only animal I know of that shoot other animals and then practice fixing the holes.

Monday, February 04, 2008

Pet Mart

Okay, a couple of days ago I heard that there were two explosions at pet markets in Iraq, which is totally heartbreaking. As far as I can tell the animals aren't members of any tribe and have a hard enough life to begin with. Plus I think most of the people at the pet markets are nice animal-loving people (except for the few who are really getting them to eat). But THEN I heard the bombers were women and I was even more sad because I expect women to behave better. Women blowing up animals? that just ruins my whole way of seeing the world. But THEN I found out that it was really retarded (Down's Syndrome) women who didn't even know they were bombers: some men strapped the bombs on them and told them to go pet the animals. My world view was restored, but it is so horrible I don't know what to do. I love animals so much that if someone gave me a heavy vest and said I could go pet the kitties, I would. What is wrong with these men? And why doesn't anyone call it what it is? which is just old-fashioned male culture- which seems to be about terrorizing women and children and animals and smaller men.

That night I was trying to feel better and we rented Ratatouille, and that helped not at ALL! Because in the whole movie there was only one female character (except for the old lady with the shot gun at the beginning). Even the rats were all male. How do you have a whole colony of rats and they're all boys? Who gave birth to them all? or did they just kill off all the females before filming started (I know it's animated). Have the rats gone all Taliban? Even animation, where you can make up whatever world you want is the same old boy, boy, boy. The BEE Movie? That was all about boys too. I got news for you. Bee colonies are almost entirely female. Drones are females. There is no Jerry Seinfeld bee in real life. And me and my friends are totally sick of it. How come we're expected to watch and enjoy (and then ask for the related toys) all the shows that are about boys and boy characters, but if there's a girl character then only girls are expected to watch? Next thing you know they'll be strapping a vest full of bottle rockets and roman candles to a retarded girl and telling her to go play with the dolls in the American Girl store.

Someday I'm gonna make an animated movie, and it's going to be MY fantasy. I promise you THAT will be explosive.

Wednesday, December 26, 2007

Phil and Ike up a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G

Music mogul PHIL SPECTOR has hit out at OPRAH WINFREY and WHOOPI GOLDBERG for "demonising" his friend IKE TURNER on their talkshows. Spector used the musician's funeral on Friday (21Dec07) to voice his anger at the U.S. TV stars - as well as others who have criticised him over the years. He went on to say that Ike - whose musical career was overshadowed by his image as the drug-addicted, brutally abusive former husband of Tina Turner - was "demonised and vilified" by his ex-wife.

Um, Mr. Spector, if you kill a woman at your house you don't get to criticise people for criticising your wifebeater friend. You idiot!!

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Play-Date-Rape Drug

Aqua Dot beads turn into roofies when you eat them. How did they figure that out? Now not only do we have to avoid small parts, but if the strange man offers us toys instead of candy, we could be in big trouble, cause apparently children will eat anything, even if it doesn't have the delicious taste of lead. But I guess they had to put the roofies in the toys because it's hard to get kids to drink beer or grain alcohol.

There's a lot of kids in our school who's houses are for sale or got repo'd by the bank and a lot of kids have been told that they shouldn't expect much from Santa this year. But maybe that's good because the worse the country does then the less toys from China we can buy. Of course we can't afford food so well either, and that might lead to more bead snacks.

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

HELP!!! -- FEMA's coming!

And Bush is coming - like we don't have enough trouble. We can't afford to have any of our fire or police worrying about his sorry ass. And now in addition to the hellfire and raining ash, they're sending FEMA, which as far as I know still hasn't taken care of Katrina, which was more than two years ago, but then again this is Orange County, and we have mostly white people and a lot of Republicans. School is out, so the childrens are not learnings for the tests, so I'm sure we'll have to have a lecture about that. But since our developing lungs are breathing toxic air, and our health insurance got vetoed, we are urging all children who can get out of the shelters to meet him with a bandana around your face and rage in your heart.

There is one piece of good news. The Governor called for the National Guard and the only ones they could find were guarding the Mexican border, so now we'll be able to get someone to harvest whatever food survives the fires.

Friday, October 12, 2007

Giving Turkeys A Bad Name

We got sent home early today because there was a fight between a Turkish boy and an Armenian boy. The Armenian boy said it was a genocide, and the Turkish boy said it wasn't and how dare he say that.  Of course, the slaughter of the Armenians by the Turks happened over 90 years ago, so I don't think any of the killers are still alive. I can't understand what the problem is. Maybe Congress should pass a substitute resolution that says "we condemn the mass murder of the Armenians that LOOKS like a genocide, but isn't one," and that way we can keep flying our troops out of their airbases so we can go kill a different group of people. Then the children can stop fighting and we can get back to learning important things, like history.

Tuesday, October 09, 2007

A Haunting Spectre-or

I'm glad that he hasn't gone totally free and that at least 10 of the 12 jurors were not engineers, but I'm worried about the next round. Even though there aren't that many lawyers left who haven't defended him yet, and probably no intelligent hearing seeing person who knows nothing of the case, I'm sure they will buy the same "expert" witnesses, who just happen to always testify for the defense.

But mostly I'm surprised that they haven't charged Lana Clarkson with damaging Spector's reputation and messing up his floors.

Men Behaving Badly

I know I try to keep the blog humorous, but this is an emergency!!! There's a femicide going on right now in Congo. Of course, there's a femicide going on everywhere, but it's more pronounced and obvious right now in the Congo, so please get on it. They are raping women and girls and babies - sometimes to death, and we have to help UNICEF and VDAY stop it. Please go to the VDay site and do what you can. Thanks friends.